Since my daughter was born and my old health visitor was no longer able to care for me as we were out of her catchment area I was introduced to another woman and she had made my life hell. I’ve kept most of this quiet because it embarrasses me but earlier this week I had a panic attack and broke down twice on Tuesday. Why? Because this woman has reported me to social services for clutter.
Now we had just moved in and yes our house was chaos at the time, we were doing DIY (something she told me you cannot do when you have children) and gutting a whole bedroom out so a lot of stuff was being stored all over the place but safely and wouldn’t hurt our children. But no she insisted I clean up, get rid of boxes, get rid of toys (Petit Boy apparently has too many toys), stop using cloth nappies and get rid of clutter from the floor.
I asked many times about this so-called floor clutter. I mean I’m not a super tidy person, my mother takes great care of her house but I never got that skill from her sadly so our house often does look like a mini storm came by for tea and didn’t clean up after itself. She said about the stuff on the floor. On the floor we often have some of Petit Boy’s toys (train set or cars), his bean bag, Petit Girl’s bouncer and Petit Girl’s play gym. Of course when she comes over all these things are out so the room does look a bit of a mess but what am I meant to do? Just put it all away and watch as my son cries to play with his cars but tell him he can’t because some bint thinks it is clutter and shouldn’t be out to play with? No I’m not cruel enough to do that. If he wants his cars or trains or easel out then he can have it out during the day time, whether she likes it or not.
Sadly she didn’t like it and what I now know is she reported me for “clutter” as she keeps calling it because it is a fire hazard. Next week I meet with her, Sure Start and Social Workers and hope to get some sort of idea what the hell is going on and what will happen. I’ve cried, I’ve screamed, I’ve moaned on social media and even posted pictures of our house on Instagram. I’ve had some very supportive replies from fellow parents, my son’s nursery, friends, family and I will be speaking to my doctor to place a complaint in as well.
I’m just embarrassed by the whole ordeal. I simply came to her for help. I wasn’t coping with newborn which I was failing to breastfeed and a 3 year old who was dying to start nursery. They were meant to get him early funding for nursery but failed, they were meant to get some help for me and they failed. This whole thing has made my depression far worse and close to pushing me over the edge. I feel like I have been branded a bad mother because I suffer with depression. My children are happy, healthy and growing every day in so many ways… why did she have to ruin the delights of being a parent by doing this to me?
She’s one hellish Health Visitor that I hope I never have to speak to ever again.